Tacoby Bellsbury

I forgot about this

2010-12-16T11:51:00.001-08:00

Sorry.

Note to all readers: Change in format

2009-07-23T08:55:00.000-07:00

Beginning August 1, 2009, the blog known as Tacoby Bellsbury will be changing formats. As you all know, Tacoby Bellsbury started off as a hilarious play on words upon the stolen base taken by Jacoby Ellsbury resulting in free tacos for the United States of America.

As the blog matured, Tacoby Bellsbury took on what seemed to be at the time, a mortal enemy, in the form of the blog Blastings Thrilledge. Unknowingly, Tacoby Bellsbury stole second base on a diamond casted by an underground faction of bloggers who also based their workings on clever titles based on the names of professional athletes.

After the legendary article regarding Kenny Lofton, his golf game, and his lack of a tenure with the Montreal Expos, a mutual respect was formed between Tacoby and Blastings. Admittedly, Tacoby Bellsbury was not a blog that lived up to the hype. Most recently, a pair of posts regarding Red Sox starter Brad Penny have illuminated the world wide web.

However, this blogger feels like he does not do justice in the wide world of sports blogging. At one time I called myself not a blogger but in fact a sportswriter, and a pretty good one, for my university newspaper. Perhaps that was my thought process behind starting my own sports blog, perhaps it was nothing more than a fleeting taco.

July 31st is a day which will be shared by two relatively monumental occasions: the MLB trade deadline and the final day in which Tacoby Bellsbury has anything to do with sports. Last night, I ate a satisfying meal for only $2. Coincidentally, I am a poor poor bastard seeing as our economy is still in the crapper and I just bought a car. Rent ain't cheap either. Also, I am not in poor man's shape, I have a few pounds to spare. I am willing to bet the majority of sports bloggers are in the same situation or at the very least, aren't getting many chicks, if you know what I'm saying.

I'm starting to ramble, I won't admit that I might be getting choked up here because I mean seriously guys Brad Penny is a f*ckin robot man. But I can't write about this stuff, no more articles about Kenny Lofton's swing, or Sam winning my phony contest (Sorry Sam there's no way in hell you're getting any type of prize) and Brad Penny's consistent role as major league douche bag.

Tacoby Bellsbury will now be a blog about the poor man's diet.

40 stolen bases

2009-07-13T20:34:00.000-07:00

Hey American League, suck on that. Jacoby Ellsbury on pace for 70 stolen bases.

PRIZE FOR SAM

2009-07-09T22:48:00.000-07:00

*mayormaynotbeanactualprizeforsam

Brad Penny is still f*cking awesome

2009-07-09T22:46:00.000-07:00

Maaaybe he's kind of a redneck douche...still

Facts about Brad Penny

2009-02-09T15:58:00.000-08:00

-BRAD PENNY IS AWESOME

-BRAD PENNY WILL FUCKING KILL YOU WITH ONE PUNCH

-BRAD PENNY ONCE DROPKICKED DOWN A PIRATE SHIP AND IT WAS HIS OWN PIRATE SHIP

-BRAD PENNY ONCE MADE SWEET LOVE TO MARISA TOMEI AND THEN ATE MARISA TOMEI

Happy New Year

2009-01-02T13:02:00.001-08:00

JON LESTER
JOSH BECKETT
DAISUKE MATSUZAKA
TIM WAKEFIELD
BRAD PENNY

SAM!

2008-07-22T15:43:00.001-07:00

CONGRATULATIONS!

YOU HAVE WON BIGGEST FAN! DUE TO THE RECESSION AND THE RAMPANT USE OF STEROIDS IN BASEBALL, I REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR PRIZE WILL BE DELAYED. HAVE NO FEAR, WINNER, YOU WILL BE COMPENSATED. IN LESS THAN ONE YEAR'S TIME, YOU WILL BE MAILED A NUMBER OF PRIZES.

NOTE: THIS NUMBER WILL BE GREATER THAN ZERO.

IN THE MEANTIME, PLEASE ENJOY THE FOLLOWING BLOGS WHILE TACOBY BELLSBURY MUST, AGAIN DUE TO THE RISING COSTS OF MANAGEMENT SALARIES AND TO COPE WITH THE COST OF RECENTLY WON PRIZES, ANALYZE AND RE-TOOL THE TACOBY BELLSBURY BRAND.

HTTP://200PERCENTAWESOME.BLOGSPOT.COM
HTTP://6O.TUMBLR.COM

Monsieur Lofton

2008-07-16T10:51:00.000-07:00

Houston Astros (1991)
Cleveland Indians (1992-1996 1998-2001 2007)
Atlanta Braves (1997)
Chicago White Sox (2002)
San Francisco Giants (2002)
Pittsburgh Pirates (2003)
Chicago Cubs (2003)
New York Yankees (2004)
Philadelphia Phillies (2005)
Los Angeles Dodgers (2006)
Texas Rangers (2007)

Never played for the Expos. Jamais.

I'm removing the "Douche" comment because my dear friend John Peterson has commended me with a fair "Well played" comment. And my first goal has been completed.

I am not obsessed with Blastings Thrilledge. I am also not an idiot. I'm a pretty smart dude and I really wanted to stake claim on Tacoby Bellsbury as a name and I got it. I may have disappointed the sports blog community by not being more pro-active on this blog and for that I can understand. To be honest, I'm not really a "sports blog" kind of guy.

I did create a blog to express my boredom during work with an old co-worker of mine, we engaged in a debate over who would win in a battle, a ninja or a pirate. Unable to reach a verdict and somewhat disturbed at where we were at (I was an operations specialist, not Mike Lowell's replacement waiting in the wings), we created http://200percentawesome.blogspot.com/

I will continue to write on this blog periodically. It may not be a fan page, or a gripe page, or even a baseball page in general. We do live in a pretty self-absorbed society and I might just make the damn thing about myself. I like the sports theme though, I even like the puke green background***. It's abrasive. Kinda like me. Look beyond the vomit colored lining, however, and you will see more. Perhaps, a lot more. Okay, I'm bullshitting myself now. Back to the subject.

http://biz.yahoo.com/prnews/080712/clsa008.html?.v=31

Kenny Lofton won the Korbel driving range contest at the recent celebrity golf thing. Cheers!

*** I have replaced the puke green background with Taco Bell colors, this is an experiment, your feedback is somewhat appreciated ***

Rave Reviews!

2008-07-13T19:14:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe it. People are reading Tacoby Bellsbury. Sure it's no Sons of Sam Horn or Blastings Thrilledge (it's a blog about poker and I think the NY Mets, who I am watching on TV tonight), but my friends we are in business. Here are some of the reviews I received.

Abe: "Yeah! I wanna read it...I wanna check it out!

Fernando Tatis: "Bueno!'

Sam: "Very good" (paraphrased)

Random guy #1: "I don't know what that is"

Random guy #2: Don't you mean JACOBY Bellsbury?

So anyways, I'm going to write a quick thing about my favorite baseball team besides the Sox, the Montreal Expos. Pedro. Andre Dawson. Gary Carter. Larry Walker. Vladimir Guerrero. Lee Stevens. Wait, not that last one. Fernando Tatis. I was reading my favorite poker and baseball blog, Blastings Thrilledge and he has the most dominant picture of Tatis on there. That man was ridiculous. He has the skills to hit .300 plus knock 20 and steal, say, 12. And for a team that crappy you really need to take what you can get.

The Mets are the graveyard team: Tatis, Easley, Julio Franco, Tom Glavine, I could go on. They just stack it up with has beens and never will bes, I can't wait until Kenny Lofton signs on with them for the playoffs. Oh yeah. You don't think Minaya will shell the $3 mil or whatever he wants to be the speed man off the bench? I like Endy Chavez. I like Ryan Go to Church. I hate Carlos Delgado. That's about all I can say about the Mets right now. They will sign Kenny Lofton, Wilfredo Cordero and maybe even Dante Bichette before October. Sorry, September.

Non-Stories

2008-07-10T07:40:00.000-07:00

Points for discussion for my legions of fans:

Does Adobe Photoshop control the Iranian government?
http://thelede.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/10/in-an-iranian-image-a-missile-too-many/index.html?hp

Have you ever seen a better Robocop trading card-related blog in your entire life?!
http://ed209.tumblr.com

Have you ever seen a better ninjas versus pirates versus hippies versus rednecks blog in your entire life?!
http://200percentawesome.blogspot.com

Are you one of those guys or gals who constantly barrages their friends with spam emails?
http://www.match.com (this is the nickname of the guy who does this)

Same question, but with an onslaught of links?
http://tacobybellsbury.blogspot.com

In other news, congrats to all the Boston Red Sox that made the All-Star game, we hold these truths to be self evident:
-The Boston Red Sox are the greatest sports team in history
-John Perkinson is a tool (James Patterson? Jack Pendleton?) This guy.
http://blastingsthrilledge.blogspot.com

The Shift

2008-04-27T11:01:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to make a post again. What do all of you faithful readers think about the shift on David Ortiz and other guys like Pronk (Travis Hafner)? How should players (and hitting coaches) react to this? I've been thinking that it's lose-lose for the hitter. Either they stick to their guns and keep grounding out, or they change their strategy and opt for opposite field singles or, God forbid, a bunt...I think David Ortiz could take advantage of that Fenway wall...or maybe just crank homers into straightaway center. Either way, this blog is so awesome.

Email to my buddies

2007-12-10T13:22:00.000-08:00

I have a blog. It really sucks, it was just a blog to put up a video I made of me and lacob and grace and a bunch of others singing at boston billiards. It was appropriately titled Tacoby Bellsbury. I don't have any articles on it and nobody even reads it, not even me. Well I checked it today, and some jack nut wrote a thing in his blog about my stupid blog. His blogs name?

Blastings! Thrilledge.

Listen I'm really sorry that was a bad story.

Comments:
"Wow, that was really the biggest waste of 30 seconds ever in my life"

"If you're going to lie to me, at least provide me with a link"

So Good! So Good! So Good!

2007-10-30T16:08:00.000-07:00

Tacoby Bellsbury

2007-10-27T13:58:00.001-07:00

Jacoby Ellsbury stole a base. America won free tacos. This is monumental.